Sound assesment.

Kylie Minogue is trying to stop Kylie Jenner from patenting 'Kylie' in the US.  I'm a bit surprised that a) you can patent a first name, b) that it is worth patenting a name and c) that Kylie would lower herself to fight it, thereby proving a) and b) are worth it.  I'm wondering what patenting a name will do for you.  Does it become a brand?  Will we be buying a Kylie soon?  What is a Kylie?
Who is Kylie Jenner anyway?

Meanwhile, over in Austria, the TV show 'The Jump' continues to send contestants home with various breaks and strains, the latest being Heather Mills.  Mercifully it ends next Sunday, so they can recuperate for next year.  Dear Heather was quoted as saying that taking part this year was a 'no brainer' for her.  Sums it up really.

Back in the UK, and some residents of Grimsby were asked to view Grimsby (the film) and give a critique.  Overwhelmingly, they said it was a bit over the top for them, but the most obvious issue was that the accents were nowhere like representative of Grimsby.   

What's in a name?

The FBI v. privacy on your phone row rumbles on, with Tim Cook (boss of Apple) stating that allowing the FBI into your phone would be dangerous from a public safety point of view and gives the example of parents that track their children on the phone, implying that this information would be readily available to child molesters.  I would have thought low tech methods such as 'where's the nearest school' would be more likely to be used.

The new underground line across London has been officially named the Elizabeth Line by the Queen, with some commentators speculating on how odd it is that the person who named it is least likely to use it.  I'm not sure this is really noteworthy given the number of other public infrastructure items names after members of the royal family.  e.g. I don't know how many Princess of Wales hospitals there are in the UK, but I know of 3 that have never been frequented by a Priness of Wales.

Trading in Futures.

A production of 'Cleansed', a play at the National Theatre, has caused 5 people to faint during performances due to the graphic violence.  I would be very happy if I was one of the performers, surely the best review you will ever receive.

Donald Trump continues to persuade Republican voters that he is the man for the top job.  The latest endorsement comes from Nevada with his rivals well down on votes.
I wonder when one of two of them will drop out, because with 5 contenders surely the opposition is being very diluted, and if we are to believe seasoned political commentators, 'Momentum' is a big factor in determining where people put their cross in the box, and he has definitely got momentum now.

Nearer home, the EU debate is big news, which is very disappointing given that we have to put up with this stuff until June 23rd.  I was hoping for it to start slowly and build up, but I get the impression that both sides are firing off their biggest shots first so it should be interesting what they drag out in the latter stages of the debate.  Same old same old I guess.
I'm contemplating voting 'out' even though I am instinctively for staying in, but I'm only contemplating this to see what it would be like, then we would know if the 'in' arguments are valid.  However, I'm a bit perplexed by the 'the unknown' argument to stay in.  For example, I have never known for sure what I am getting for Christmas, but I never turn it down.

The Eyes Have It.

An American artist put a message in a bottle in New York and threw it into the sea.  It has been found almost 3 years later in France, by another painter.  Wow! Coincidence or what?! 
Quite a story, but does nothing to dispel the image of all artists being beach bums.

In one of the occasional quizzes in the Guardian, I got 2 out of 10, and they were guesses.  It was a 'Match the Secret to the Eyes' film quiz.  How obscure can you get?  Anyway, I managed to guess who a few of the people were, and the 2 I got right were pure guesses.  I blame the poor acting.

In the meantime, our political leaders in Westminster are out in force grabbing the headlines with EU shenanigans.  It's very odd listening to political speeches without thinking along party lines, but this topic is so apolitical, it doesn't make sense for it to be debated in parliament.
I can understand now why the 'Outers' don't want divisive figures such as Mr Farage as a figurehead and really you want someone as popular as possible leading your respective campaign, if, indeed you think that any campaigning will change peoples minds.  Speaking as Mr Average Bloke, I can't see anyone convincing me to change my mind.

European Title.

So the EU debate enters a new phase now that Mr Cameron has returned from Brussels with some sort of agreement.  I'm sure we'll see plenty of extreme views over the coming months, but at leats we only have to wait until late June before we get the result.
This vote will be quite different than our 'normal' voting in that it's not really a political party issue.  Both Labour and Torys have both factions, and some big names e.g. Boris Johnson who usually command a few column inches is not siding with his leader.  Therefore, the normal Tory or Labour Bashing gangs  will have to think of a new policy if they are to win this one.  I even wonder if the Tories have split intentionally so as to garner more favourable support for Mr Cameron's stance of wanting to remain in Europe.  What I mean is, that if the 'stay in' option was seen as purely a vote for the Tory party, the might not get the result that want.  Mind you, I'm probably over-thinking that one.
May be he'll do a U-turn in a few weeks and bring loads of votes across with him?   I'll stop now.

Luckily for us, Bernie Ecclestone doesn't pick who should run the EU otherwise we would have Vladimir Putin in charge.  He thinks Putin is the man for the job, able to sort out Syria and do a jolly good job without being weighed down by that 'democracy' thing.
I wonder if he realises that Syria isn't in Europe?

Laughing Gas.

I like one-liners, especially those that make you think for a second or two before you laugh out loud just as the brain whips everything into shape to display 'This is Funny, laugh', or whatever it is the brain does to make you laugh.  I often (well, not very often to be truthful) wonder what makes some people laugh at different things to others, and I'm not talking about the empathy v. non-empathy situation when someone stands on a fork and it springs up and hits him painfully in the face.  I'm talking about why some people laugh continually at Tim Vine or Ken Dodd, whilst others sit there stony faced wondering why I am rolling around on the floor.
It's because I'm more sophisticated of course.  I understand the jokes, whilst those thickos over there 'don't get it'.  Of course its that.
..or perhaps not.  Perhaps the human mind needs an individual sequence of events/words to unlock the laugh door within.
I still can't understand though why some people don't laugh at 'Venison, its dear isn't it?'

Top Marks.

The venerable Eurovision song contest is changing the voting system whereby each country has 2 lots of votes each - the 'jury' of (presumably) experts and the general public, thereby reducing the risk of 'null points' to those unlucky songs at the bottom end of the talent spectrum.
Until now, the marks have been combined, giving the marks to the countries top 8 (or is it 10?) songs.  The new system will potentially have a maximum of 16 (20?) scoring countries, so the chances of anyone missing out at the end of the night is doubtful, although not impossible.
I read a book a few years ago based around these null-pointers, starting with the competitions' first ignominious loser from Norway.  A very entertaining book if I remember rightly, and charted the subsequent success (or not) of the various performers.

An interesting read can be found by perusing the British food survey which has been collating data since 1974.  Stand out headlines to me are that tea consumption has halved since the 70s, and I now eat 75g of pizza a week, none at all in 1974.

Sweet Dreams.

Apple have been asked by the FBI to make an iPhone 5C easier to break into, but the company are not happy with the request and so far, have refused.
The most interesting aspect of it to me is that the FBI cannot break into it without apple helping them, thereby giving Apple quite a good marketing angle to pursue.

Some survey or other have found that some coffee shops sell drinks with up to 20 teaspoons of sugar in them.  That seems to be maybe a bit too sweet for me.  The BBC helpfully informs us that a teaspoon of sugar is 4 grams.  That's public broadcasting for you.
The Action on Sugar chairman pronounces that 'it's no wonder we are an obese society', which flies in the face of the 'it's the poor people that suffer the most' argument when a Starbucks hot mulled fruit with grapefruit will set you back a few hours of the living wage.  I doubt if these drinks are making the poor people more obese, just a few fat bankers.

Religious Affairs.

BBC3 switches to on-line only today.  Not the biggest headline news, but quite significant in the media world.
A year ago, it might have been more significant, but nowadays there is a very blurred line between 'traditional' and 'modern' media.  I'm not sure about the stats, but Netflix, Amazon and others seem to be gaining momentum as a standard domestic TV offering, these are all online of course, hence the rather low key BBC3 move.
Originally, BBC3 was mooted to be ready for closing down, but the transfer to on-line could become the de-facto path that the rest of the terrestrial channels eventually go.  Maybe they can switch off the transmitters earlier than planned.

There have been some revealing letters from Pope Paul II published to his 'very good friend' (a married woman) as well as photographs that show him in civvies instead of his papal garments.  Its a bit like seeing someone without their glasses - you don't recognise them.  I can't help but think that if it was a politician the press would have been picking over every detail and reading/creating some scandalous revelation, but as it's his once-upon-a-time holiness with friends in high places they have been quite restrained.

Pub Talk.

I struggle to define what Twitter actually is.  One day it can be one of the best ways to convey news events ever seen by mankind, the next day it's dragged down to gutter as the best way to give someone some personal grief.
For example, the ridiculous comments aimed at Stephen Fry after hosting the Baftas last night when he made a disparaging joke about one of the winners.  Don't people know that pub language should stay in the pub?
All I can think is that one man's over the top comments and another man's normal way of speaking.
I don't know why I sympathise with Stephen Fry though, he has been one of Twitters greatest advocates with millions of followers, so it stands to reason that he would get a larger proportional share of flak.  You can't expect to invite a huge number of people into the pub and not receive some negative comments.

Just over 3 weeks since my cracked ribs incident, but I woke up in the night feeling like it had only just happened.  Don't know what I did, but must have been laid the 'wrong' way.  Pity, because I was feeling like they were getting back to normal, managing a 7 mile run at the weekend.  Here's holing it's a temporary setback.

Calculating.

Top Gear continues to command more column inches and therefore more public interest than it surely deserves.  The latest red hot news is the 'presenter line-up'.  Enthralling.

Other TV news:  The Jump is living up to expectations by delivering plenty of competitors to the hospital.  I can't see them commissioning another series, just too dangerous.  Surely these 3rd rate celebrities are not that desperate, are they?

A survey of shoppers has revealed that most of us overspend because we can't work out the best deal, and the Guardian, to prove our incompetence has created an online quiz.  I got a measly 2 out of 6 correct, but they missed the additional info that all supermarkets put on the labelling, that is the price per 100g or similar for comparison, so 0 out of 10 to the Guardian for that one.

Big jumper

You wouldn't expect to see someone jumping 60ft on to a bed in John Lewis, but it happened yesterday.  And it wasn't a student prank, it was a 60 year old woman, so something must have gone drastically wrong there.  My local House of Fraser has glass barriers around the escalators, something that I'm not keen of, or is it because I'm generally averse to all shopping.

There's a £47 million cycling 'superhighway' proposed fro London that will run across the city east to west.  It's a huge project, and to complicate it, taxi drivers have tried to get it stopped on the grounds that it breached planning rules, takes up too much road space etc.  It's no surprise that the taxi drivers are miffed, but typical that going to court seems to be a 'normal' way of going on nowadays to try and get things overturned.  I thought the local planning procedures  should have taken care of that.
I guess the lesson is to take your bike when you visit the capital then you don't have to worry about the black cab and Uber politics.
Oh, and mind how you go in John Lewis.

True Believers.

Since Richard III was reburied at Leicester, the football team have enjoyed a remarkable run of success and are now favourites to win the Premier league.
They must be linked.

A rather enjoyable radio show yesterday discussed how the human brain is trained, nurtured and moulded into shape as we grow up.  One aspect was that we 'imagine' or 'see' things according to our upbringing/conditioning e.g. you never find a atheist seeing an image of Jesus in a bit of toast or someone who doesn't believe ghosts exist never sees them.

Birds of a feather.

I understand it was 'Superbowl 50' last night or 'SB50' if you're immersed in Twitterspeak, and it seems that the highlight of the show was Beyoncé's half time show.  Beyoncé is an interesting character.  She has the normal commercial characteristics of a pop star, probably carefully cultivated image by her manager/record label, but she also has some political involvement that (commercially) is a bit more risky, so she's OK in my book.  She's also pleasing on the eye.

Here in the UK, we only get to hear about the half time performances at the Superbowl.  It's a world final isn't it?  Odd that.

Meanwhile, in London, the metropolitan police are looking at using eagles to take out drones.  Not any old drone, but those used for criminal practices.  Trials in the Netherlands have shown that they see drones as natural enemies and are quite adept at avoiding the rotors.  Must be the eagle eye.  An reporter in the Guardian interviewed Maria and Angela Eagle, and although they say they were brought up to believe they can do anything, there was no mention of drones.

Great Expectations.

Mr. Assange has hit the headlines again today after the UN decided he was being 'arbitrarily detained'.  He is obviously delighted that he is now free to leave the embassy.
I often feel arbitrarily detained at home when I am given a list of jobs to do. Its the same at work, don't these people know they are breaking the law??

Meanwhile, back in fantasy land, we hear that Matt Le Blanc will be presenting the new Top Gear with Chris Evans and other (as yet unnamed) presenters.  This breath-taking news has filled more column inches than it probably deserves, and rest assured he will fill many more when he doesn't perform to the newspapers' liking.

I don't believe it!

At last.  Lord Lucan had finally died, or at least they have released a death certificate so he could be rise from the dead albeit unlikely after 42 years.  I find it very odd that hew declared dead in 1999, but the death certificate had to wait 17 years.  Someone must have had a big pile to go through.

Meanwhile, the bakery that refused to bake a celebration cake displaying some words in praise of the gay community finds itself back in court trying to overturn the damages case it lost a while back.  They are backed by some sort of Christian society (who I guess is funding the appeal), whilst the damaged party have a 'human rights' group fighting their corner. 
It's an interesting battle, rights versus beliefs and in my opinion there can be no winner.  I'm almost certain that the rights will win over beliefs, but only because law is (usually) based on cold hard facts, rather than a belief system.  I can't imagine any divine intervention will manifest itself, but it would be good if it did.

Politically motivated.

Ted Cruz.  At least we now know the identity of one of Donald Trump's competitors after he won the first Republican nomination vote.  Trouble is, he appears to be just as mad as DT, or at least as right wing, which might be the same thing.
Hilary, meanwhile has drawn the first contest with her main rival, Bernie Sanders, who will probably pull out as the race hots up - he is 74 you know.  'Age is but a number' I hear you say, yes, but it's big one for him.

Back in the UK, PM Cameron continues to push the Europeans over changes to the EU rules and regs, hoping to secure something that looks good back home, but keeps the rest of the EU leaders happy.  I'm sure he will come up with something, but there are so many 'doubters' in the press that like an easy headline it doesn't matter how he spins it, it will be shouted down.  It's far too easy to be negative.

Nearer home, well, at home actually, I climbed back on board my bike 10 days after hitting the tarmac.  I avoided any jarring by using my rollers, and managed about 16 miles in about 50 minutes, taking in Game of Thrones, series 1, episode 5.  I struggle to hear it above the noise of the rollers, but at least the stage settings are interesting to look at.  The bath scene needed no commentary.

It's best not to say.

The world's best chef has sadly passed away, but I'm wondering what is meant by the 'world's best chef' tag.  Did he enter a competition?  Was he fastest whisking a soufflé?  Because good food is so subjective, I'm not sure anyone can be the worlds best without some sort of criteria.  A bit like the worlds best driver is not Lewis Hamilton, but he's the quickest over 200 miles or so, round a track, in a Formula 1 car etc., etc.